To My Ghost,

I’m not going to demonize you for what you did. You probably don’t even realize that cutting off all contact between us with zero explanation has a catchy pop culture term. “Ghosting” is common for people who originally met through digital means and this isn’t the first time it has happened to me. I’ll admit your sudden disappearance hurt a little more than usual. I thought our first two dates had been great and we already had plans for a third. There were no red flags or warnings that I could see. I can only assume you’ve met someone else who has commanded your full attention. That, or you’re dead. I would rather imagine you happy with someone else than dead, so let’s stick with the original theory.

I’m writing to thank you for the short time we had together. I’ve spent years trying to protect myself from being vulnerable and not opening up to anyone, expressly to avoid the type of hurt you caused me. That’s why actually being hurt, and having these feelings, is a win for me. I wasn’t sure it was even possible for me to care anymore. My heart isn’t damaged beyond repair. I can have feelings for another person. It was way too early to use the word “love” to describe how I felt about you, but the first spark of affection and attraction was starting to stir. Even though that spark was ultimately pretty one-sided, just knowing that feeling is still possible for me means more than you’ll ever know. Mostly because we’re no longer communicating, so I can’t tell you, but also because the type of person who thinks ghosting is a good way to end a dating acquaintanceship – even one as brief as ours – isn’t the type of person who could ever really understand me.

I also want to thank you for the timely reminder to be discerning in my dating choices and for showing your true colors so early on. Both are much appreciated.

In the end, we can only be judged by our actions. So I will wish you well now and in the future. I would also tell you to lose my number, but it seems you already have.

Take care,

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